Until the day of the funeral, Marilyn has never thought about the last time she
would see her daughter. She would have imagined a touching bedside scene, like
in the movies: herself white-haired and elderly and content, in a satin bed jacket,
ready to say her good-byes; Lydia a grown woman, confident and poised,
holding her mother’s hands in hers, a doctor by then, unfazed by the great cycle
of life and death. And Lydia, though Marilyn does not admit it, is the face she
would want to see last—not Nath or Hannah or even James, but the daughter she
thinks of first and always. Now her last glimpse of Lydia has already passed:
James, to her bewilderment, has insisted on a closed-casket funeral. She will not
even get to see her daughter’s face one last time, and for the past three days, she
has told James this over and over, sometimes furious, sometimes through tears.
James, for his part, cannot find the words to tell her what he discovered on going
to identify Lydia’s body: there is only half a face left, barely preserved by the
cold water of the lake; the other half had already been eaten away. He ignores
his wife and keeps his eyes trained on the rearview mirror as he backs into the
street.
The cemetery is only a fifteen-minute walk from their house, but they drive
anyway. As they turn onto the main road that circles the lake, Marilyn looks
sharply to the left, as if she’s spotted something on the shoulder of her husband’s
jacket. She doesn’t want to see the pier, the rowboat now re-moored, the lake
itself stretching out into the distance. James has the car windows rolled up tight,
but the breeze shakes the leaves of the trees on the banks and corrugates the
surface of the water. It will be there forever, the lake: every time they leave their
house, they will see it. In the backseat, Nath and Hannah wonder in unison if
their mother will turn her head away for the rest of her life, every time she
passes by. The lake glints in the sun like a shiny tin roof, and Nath’s eyes begin
to water. It seems inappropriate for the light to be so bright, for the sky to be so
blue, and he’s relieved when a cloud drifts over the sun and the water turns from
silver to gray At the cemetery, they pull into the parking lot. Middlewood is proud of its
garden cemetery, a sort of graveyard and botanical garden in one, with winding
paths and small brass signs to identify the flora. Nath remembers middle-school
science trips with sketch pads and field guides; once the teacher had promised
ten extra-credit points to the person who could gather the most kinds of leaves.
There had been a funeral that day, too, and Tommy Reed had tiptoed between
rows of folding chairs to the sassafras tree, right in the middle of the eulogy, and
plucked a leaf from a low-hanging branch. Mr. Rexford hadn’t noticed and had
complimented Tommy on being the only one to find Sassafras albidum, and the
whole class had stifled giggles and high-fived Tommy on the bus ride home.
Now, as they walk single file toward the cluster of chairs set up in the distance,
Nath wants to go back in time and punch Tommy Reed.
In Lydia’s honor, the school has closed for the day, and Lydia’s classmates
come, lots of them. Looking at them, James and Marilyn realize just how long it
has been since they’ve seen these girls: years. For a moment they don’t
recognize Karen Adler with her hair grown long, or Pam Saunders without her
braces. James, thinking of the crossed-out list of names, finds himself staring
and turns away. Slowly the chairs fill with some of Nath’s classmates, with
juniors and freshmen he finds vaguely familiar but doesn’t really know. Even the
neighbors, as they file in, feel like strangers. His parents never go out or
entertain; they have no dinner parties, no bridge group, no hunting buddies or
luncheon pals. Like Lydia, no real friends. Hannah and Nath recognize a few
professors from the university, their father’s teaching assistant, but most of the
faces in the chairs are strangers. Why are they even here, Nath wonders, and
when the service starts and they all crane their necks toward the coffin at the
front, under the sassafras tree, he understands. They are drawn by the spectacle
of sudden death. For the past week, ever since the police dragged the lake, the
headlines in the Middlewood Monitor have all been about Lydia. Oriental Girl
Found Drowned in Pond.
The minister looks like President Ford, flat-browed, white-toothed, clean-cut,
and solid. The Lees do not attend church, but the funeral home had
recommended him, and James had accepted without asking any questions. Now
James sits up straight, pressing the chair’s back into his shoulder blades, and
tries to listen to the service. The minister reads the Twenty-third Psalm, but in
the revised text: I have everything I need instead of I shall not want; Even if I
walk through a very dark valley instead of Yea, though I walk through the valley
of the shadow of death. It feels disrespectful, a corner cut. Like burying his
daughter in a plywood box. What else could you expect from this town, he thinks. On his right, the scent of the lilies on the casket hits Marilyn like a warm,
wet fog, and she nearly retches. For the first time, she wishes she were the sort
of woman, like her mother, who carried a handkerchief. She would have pressed
it to her face and let it filter the air, and when she lowered it the cloth would be
dirty pink, the color of old bricks. Beside her, Hannah knits her fingers. She
would like to worm her hand onto her mother’s lap, but she doesn’t dare. Nor
does she dare look at the coffin. Lydia is not inside, she reminds herself, taking a
deep breath, only her body—but then where is Lydia herself? Everyone is so still
that to the birds floating overhead, she thinks, they must look like a cluster of
statues.
Out of the corner of his eye, Nath spots Jack sitting at the edge of the crowd
beside his mother. He imagines grabbing Jack by the shirt collar to find out what
he knows. For the past week, his father has called the police every morning
asking for new information, but Officer Fiske says only, over and over, that they
are still investigating. If only the police were here now, Nath thinks. Should he
tell his father? Jack stares at the ground in front of him, as if he is too ashamed
to look up. And then, when Nath himself glances back to the front, the coffin has
already been lowered into the ground. The polished wood, the white lilies
fastened to its top—vanished, just like that: nothing but the blank space where it
had once stood. He’s missed it all. His sister is gone.
Something wet touches his neck. He reaches up to wipe it away and
discovers that his whole face is wet, that he’s been crying silently. On the other
side of the crowd, Jack’s blue eyes are suddenly fixed on him, and Nath blots his
cheek in the crook of his arm.
The mourners begin to leave, a thin line of backs filing toward the parking
area and the street. A few of Nath’s classmates, like Miles Fuller, give him a
sympathetic glance, but most—embarrassed by his tears—decide not to speak to
him, and turn away. They won’t have another chance; in light of Nath’s high
grades and the tragic situation, the principal will exempt him from the last three
weeks of school, and Nath himself will decide not to attend commencement.
Some of the neighbors circle the Lees, squeezing their arms and murmuring
condolences; a few of them pat Hannah on the head, as if she’s a tiny child, or a
dog. Except for Janet Wolff, her usual white doctor’s coat replaced by a trim
black suit, James and Marilyn don’t recognize most of them. By the time Janet
reaches her, Marilyn’s palms feel grimy, her whole body dirty, like a rag passed
from hand to soiled hand, and she can barely stand Janet’s touch on her elbow.
On the other side of the grave, Jack stands off to the side, waiting for his
mother, half-hidden in the shadow of a big elm. Nath weaves his way over,
cornering him against the tree trunk, and Hannah, trapped at her parents’ side by
a thicket of adults, watches her brother nervously.a thicket of adults, watches her brother nervously.
“What are you doing here?” Nath demands. Up close, he can see that Jack’s
shirt is dark blue, not black, that though he’s wearing dress pants he still has on
his old black-and-white tennis shoes with the hole in the toe.
“Hey,” Jack says, eyes still on the ground. “Nath. How are you?”
“How do you think I am?” Nath’s voice cracks, and he hates himself for it.
“I gotta go,” Jack says. “My mom’s waiting.” A pause. “I’m really sorry
about your sister.” He turns away, and Nath catches him by the arm.
“Are you?” He’s never grabbed anyone before, and he feels tough doing it,
like a detective in a movie. “You know, the police want to talk to you.” People
are beginning to stare—James and Marilyn hear their son’s raised voice and look
around—but he doesn’t care. He leans in closer, almost to Jack’s nose. “Look, I
know she was with you that Monday.”
For the first time Jack looks Nath in the face: a flash of startled blue eyes.
“She told you?”
Nath lurches forward so that he and Jack are chest to chest. Blood throbs in
his right temple. “She didn’t have to tell me. Do you think I’m stupid?”
“Look, Nath,” Jack mumbles. “If Lydia told you that I—”
He breaks off suddenly, as Nath’s parents and Dr. Wolff come within
earshot. Nath stumbles backward a few steps, glaring at Jack, at his father for
interrupting, at the elm tree itself for not being farther away.
“Jack,” Dr. Wolff says sharply. “Everything all right?”
“Fine.” Jack glances at Nath, then at the adults. “Mr. Lee, Mrs. Lee, I’m very
sorry for your loss.”
“Thank you for coming,” says James. He waits until the Wolffs have started
down the curving path out of the cemetery before grabbing Nath by the shoulder.
“What’s the matter with you?” he hisses. “Picking a fight at your sister’s
funeral.”
Behind his mother, Jack gives a quick backward glance, and when his gaze
meets Nath’s, there’s no doubt: he is frightened. Then he turns the curve and is
gone.
Nath lets out his breath. “That bastard knows something about Lydia.”
“You don’t go around making trouble. You let the police do their work.”
“James,” Marilyn says, “don’t shout.” She touches her fingers to her temple,
as if she has a headache, and closes her eyes. To Nath’s horror, a dark drop of
blood runs down the side of her face—no, it’s only a tear, stained black by
mascara, leaving a dirty gray trail on her cheek. Hannah, her small heart awash
in pity, reaches up to take her hand, but her mother doesn’t notice. In a moment
Hannah contents herself by clasping her own fingers behind her back.
James fishes in his jacket pocket for his keys. “I’m taking your mothe
sister home. When you’ve cooled off, you can walk.” As the words leave his
mouth, he winces. Deep inside, he wants more than anything to calm Nath, to
put a comforting and weighty hand on his shoulder, to fold him into his arms, on
this day of all days. But already it takes all his strength to keep his own face
from crumpling, to stop his own knees from buckling and spilling him to the
ground. He turns away and grabs Hannah’s arm. Hannah, at least, always does
what she’s told.
Nath sinks down on the roots of the elm and watches his parents head back
toward the car, Hannah trailing after them with one wistful backward glance. His
father doesn’t know what Jack is like. Jack has lived down the street from them
for eleven years, since he and Nath were in the first grade, and to Nath’s parents
he is just a neighbor boy, the scruffy one with the dog and that old secondhand
car. In school, though, everyone knows. Every few weeks a different girl. Every
girl the same story. Jack doesn’t date; there are no dinners out, no flowers, no
boxes of chocolates in cellophane wrap. He simply drives the girl out to the
Point or the drive-in or a parking lot somewhere and spreads a blanket across the
backseat of his car. A week or two later, he stops calling and moves on. He’s
known to make a specialty of deflowering virgins. At school, the girls are proud
of it, like they’ve joined an exclusive club; clustered at their lockers, they
whisper a giggling, salacious play-by-play. Jack himself talks to no one. It’s
common knowledge that he’s alone most of the time: his mother works night
shifts at the hospital, six nights a week. He does not eat in the school cafeteria;
he does not go to the dances. In class, he sits in the back row, picking the next
girl he’ll ask for a ride. This spring he had picked Lydia.
Nath huddles in the cemetery an hour, two hours, three, watching the
cemetery workers stack the folding chairs, gather the flowers, pluck balled-up
papers and tissues from the grass. In his mind, he dredges up every single thing
he’s ever heard about Jack, every fact, every rumor. The two begin to blur, and
by the time he is ready to head home, he is bubbling with a terrible fury. He tries
to imagine Lydia with Jack, tries desperately not to picture them together. Had
Jack hurt her somehow? He doesn’t know. He knows only that Jack is at the
heart of everything, and he promises himself he will find out how. Only when
the gravediggers lift their shovels and approach the open grave does Nath
clamber to his feet and turn away.
As he skirts the edge of the lake and turns onto their street, he spots a police
car parked outside Jack’s house. About goddamn time, Nath thinks. He sidles
closer to the house, slouching below the line of windows. Behind the screen, the
front door stands open, and he climbs the porch stairs on his toes, sticking to the edges of the worn boards, making sure they don’t squeak. It’s his sister they’re
talking about, he tells himself with each step; he has every right. At the top, he
leans toward the screen door. He can’t see anything except the entryway, but he
can hear Jack in the living room, explaining slowly, loudly, as if it’s the second
or third time.
“She had skipped ahead into physics. Her mom wanted her in with the
juniors.”
“You were in that class. Aren’t you a senior?”
“I told you,” Jack says, impatient. “I had to take it over. I failed.”
Dr. Wolff’s voice, now: “He has a B-plus in the class this term. I told you
you’d do fine if you would just do the work, Jack.”
Outside, Nath blinks. Jack? A B-plus?
A rustle, as if the policeman has turned the page of a notebook. Then: “What
was the nature of your relationship with Lydia?” The sound of his sister’s name
in the policeman’s voice, so crisp and official, as if it were nothing more than a
label, startles Nath. It seems to startle Jack, too: there’s a sharpness to his tone
that wasn’t there before.
“We were friends. That’s all.”
“Several people said they saw the two of you together after school in your
car.”
“I was teaching her to drive.” Nath wishes he could see Jack’s face. Didn’t
they know he must be lying? But the policeman seems to accept this.
“When was the last time you saw Lydia?” the policeman asks now.
“Monday afternoon. Before she disappeared.”
“What were you doing?”
“We were sitting in my car and smoking.”
A pause as the policeman makes a note of this. “And you were at the
hospital, Mrs. Wolff?”
“Doctor.”
The policeman coughs gently. “Pardon me. Dr. Wolff. You were at work?”
“I usually take the evening shift. Every day except Sundays.”
“Did Lydia seem upset on Monday?”
Another pause before Jack responds. “Lydia was always upset.”
Because of you, Nath thinks. His throat is so tight the words can’t squeeze
through. The edges of the door waver and blur, like a heat mirage. He digs his
fingernail into his palm, hard, until the doorway sharpens again.
“Upset about what?”
“Upset about everything.” Jack’s voice is lower now, almost a sigh. “About
her grades. About her parents. About her brother leaving for college. Lots of
things.” He sighs then for real, and when he speaks again, his voice is brittle things.” He sighs then for real, and when he speaks again, his voice is brittle,
ready to snap. “How should I know?”
Nath backs away from the door and creeps down the stairs. He doesn’t need
to hear any more. At home, not wanting to see anyone, he slips upstairs to his
room to ruminate over what he’s heard.
There’s no one for him to see anyway. While Nath fretted under the elm tree,
his family has dispersed. During the car ride, Marilyn doesn’t look at James
once, focusing instead on her knuckles, picking at her cuticles, fiddling with the
strap of her handbag. As soon as they come inside, Marilyn says she wants to lie
down, and Hannah too vanishes into her room without a word. For a moment
James considers joining Marilyn in their bedroom. He’s filled with a deep
longing to burrow against her, to feel her weight and warmth surrounding him,
shielding him from everything else. To cling to her and feel her cling to him and
let their bodies comfort each other. But something scratches and scratches at the
edge of James’s mind, and at last he lifts his keys from the table again. There is
something he must do at the office, urgently. It cannot wait another minute.
When the police had asked if he wanted a copy of the autopsy, he had given
them his office address. Then yesterday, a thick manila envelope appeared in his
mail cubby, and he decided he’d made a mistake: he didn’t want to see it, ever.
At the same time, he could not bring himself to throw it away. Instead he slipped
it into the bottom drawer of his desk and locked it. It would be there, he thought,
if he ever changed his mind. He had never expected to.
It is lunchtime, and the office is almost empty; only Myrna, the department
secretary, still sits at her desk, changing the ribbon of her typewriter. All the
other office doors are shut, their frosted-glass windows dim. Now James unlocks
the drawer, takes a deep breath, and slits the envelope open with his finger.
He has never seen an autopsy report before and expects charts and diagrams,
but it opens like a teacher’s progress report: The subject is a well-developed,
well-nourished Oriental female. It tells him things he already knows: that she
was sixteen years old, sixty-five inches tall; that her hair was black, that her eyes
were blue. It tells him things he hadn’t known: the circumference of her head,
the length of each limb, that a small crescent moon scarred her left knee. It tells
him that there were no intoxicants in her blood, that there were no signs of foul
play or sexual trauma, but that suicide, homicide, or accident could not yet be
determined. The cause of death was asphyxia by drowning.
And then it begins in earnest: The chest is opened using a Y-shaped incision.
He learns the color and size of each of her organs, the weight of her brain.
That a white foam had bubbled up through her trachea and covered her nostrils
and mouth like a lace handkerchief. That her alveoli held a thin layer of silt as fine as sugar. That her lungs had marbled dark red and yellow-gray as they
starved for air; that like dough, they took the impression of a fingertip; that when
they were sectioned with a scalpel, water flowed out. That in her stomach were
snippets of lake-bottom weeds, sand, and six ounces of lake water she’d
swallowed as she sank. That the right side of her heart had swollen, as if it had
had too much to hold. That from floating head down in the water, the skin of her
head and neck had reddened to her shoulders. That due to the low temperature of
the water, she had not yet decomposed, but that the skin of her fingertips was
just beginning to peel off, like a glove.
The office air-conditioning clicks on and a cool breeze floats up from the
floor. His whole body trembles, as if he’s caught a sudden, lasting chill. With his
toe, he closes the vent, but he can’t keep his hands from shaking. He balls them
into fists and clenches his jaw to stop his teeth from chattering. In his lap, the
autopsy report quivers like something alive.
He can’t imagine telling Marilyn that these things could happen to a body
they loved. He doesn’t ever want her to know. Better to leave it as the police
summed it up: drowning. No details to catch in the crevices of her mind. The air-
conditioning shuts off, silence ballooning to fill the room, then the whole
department. The weight of everything he’s read settles on him, crushing him to
his chair. It is too heavy. He cannot even lift his head.
“Professor Lee?”
It’s Louisa, at the door, still wearing the black dress she’d worn at the funeral
that morning.
“Oh,” she says. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t think you’d come in after—” She
stops.
“It’s okay.” His voice crackles at the edges, like old leather.
Louisa slips into the room, leaving the door ajar. “Are you all right?” She
takes in his red-rimmed eyes, the slouch of his shoulders, the manila envelope in
his lap. Then she comes to stand beside him and gently takes the papers from his
hands. “You shouldn’t be here,” she says, setting them on his desk.
James shakes his head. With one hand he holds out the report.
Louisa looks down at the sheaf of papers and hesitates.
Read, James says—or tries to say. No sound emerges, but to him it seems
Louisa hears anyway. She nods, leans against the edge of the desk, and bends
her head over the pages. Her face doesn’t change as she reads, but she grows
stiller and stiller, until, at the end of the report, she rises and takes James’s hand.
“You shouldn’t be here,” Louisa says again. It’s not a question. With her
other hand, she touches the small of his back, and he can feel her warmth
through his shirt. Then she says, “Why don’t you come to my apartment. I’ll cook you some lunch.” And he nods.
Her apartment is a third-floor walk-up, only six blocks from campus. Outside
apartment 3A Louisa hesitates, just for a moment. Then she unlocks the door and
lets them in and leads him straight to the bedroom.
Everything about her is different: the flex of her limbs, the texture of her
skin. Even her taste is different, slightly tangy, like citrus, as he touches his
tongue to hers. When she kneels over him to undo the buttons of his shirt, her
hair curtains her face. James closes his eyes then, lets out a long, shuddering
sigh. Afterward he falls asleep with Louisa still atop him. Since Lydia was found
—the only word he can bear to use for it—the little sleep he’s had has been
restless. In his dreams, no one but him remembers what has happened to Lydia;
he alone is acutely aware, and over and over he must persuade Marilyn, Nath,
complete strangers that his daughter is dead. I saw her body. One of her blue
eyes was gone. Now, still slicked to Louisa with sweat, he sleeps soundly for the
first time in days, a dreamless sleep: his mind, for the moment, gone blissfully
blank.
At home, in their bedroom, Marilyn too wills her mind to go blank, but
nothing happens. For hours, trying to sleep, she has been counting the flowers on
her pillowcase: not the big red poppies that sprawl across the cotton, but the blue
forget-me-nots of the background pattern, the chorus dancers behind the divas.
She keeps losing track, moving from eighty-nine back down to eighty, crossing a
fold in the fabric and forgetting which are accounted for, which have yet to be
numbered. By the time she reaches two hundred, she knows that sleep is
impossible. She can’t keep her eyes closed; even blinking makes her jittery.
Whenever she tries to lie still, her mind whirrs to life like an overwound toy.
Upstairs, there is no sound from Hannah; downstairs, no sign of Nath. At last,
just as James sinks into sleep across town, she rises and goes where her thoughts
have been all this time: Lydia’s room.
It still smells like Lydia. Not just the powdery flowers of her perfume, or the
clean scent of shampoo on her pillowcase, or the trace of cigarette smoke
—Karen smokes, Lydia had explained when Marilyn sniffed suspiciously one
day. It gets all on my clothes and books and everything. No, when Marilyn
breathes in deep, she can smell Lydia herself under all those surface layers, the
sour-sweet smell of her skin. She could spend hours here, drawing the air up and
holding it against her palate like the bouquet of a fine wine. Drinking her in.
In this room a deep ache suffuses her, as if her bones are bruised. Yet it feels
good, too. Everything here reminds her of what Lydia could have been. Prints of
Leonardo’s Vitruvian Man, of Marie Curie holding up a vial—every poster she’d
given to Lydia since she was a child—still hung proudly on the wall. Sincechildhood, Lydia had wanted to be a doctor, just as her mother once had. Last
summer she had even taken a biology course at the college so that she could skip
ahead into physics. On the bulletin board hang blue ribbons from years of
science fairs, an illustrated periodic table, a real stethoscope that Marilyn had
special-ordered for her thirteenth birthday. The bookshelf is so full of books that
some are crammed in sideways at the top: A Brief History of Medicine, she reads
upside down. Rosalind Franklin and DNA. All the books Marilyn had given her
over the years to inspire her, to show her what she could accomplish.
Everywhere, evidence of her daughter’s talent and ambition. A fine layer of dust
has already begun to coat everything. For a long time, Lydia had shooed her out
when she came to vacuum and dust and tidy. “I’m busy, Mom,” she had said,
tapping the tip of her pen against her textbook, and Marilyn would nod and kiss
her on the head and shut the door behind her. Now there is no one to turn her
away, but she looks at Lydia’s boot, tipped on its side on the carpet, thinks of her
daughter kicking it off, and lets it lie.
Somewhere in this room, she is sure, is the answer to what happened. And
there, on the bottom shelf of the bookcase, she sees the neat row of diaries lined
up by year. Marilyn had given Lydia her first diary the Christmas she was five, a
flowered one with gilt edges and a key lighter than a paper clip. Her daughter
had unwrapped it and turned it over and over in her hands, touching the tiny
keyhole, as if she didn’t know what it was for. “For writing down your secrets,”
Marilyn had said with a smile, and Lydia had smiled back up at her and said,
“But Mom, I don’t have any secrets.”
At the time, Marilyn had laughed. What secrets could a daughter keep from
her mother, anyway? Still, every year, she gave Lydia another diary. Now she
thinks of all those crossed-out phone numbers, that long list of girls who said
they barely knew Lydia at all. Of boys from school. Of strange men who might
lurch out of the shadows. With one finger, she tugs out the last diary: 1977. It
will tell her, she thinks. Everything Lydia no longer can. Who she had been
seeing. Why she had lied to them. Why she went down to the lake.
The key is missing, but Marilyn jams the tip of a ballpoint into the catch and
forces the flimsy lock open. The first page she sees, April 10, is blank. She
checks May 2, the night Lydia disappeared. Nothing. Nothing for May 1, or
anything in April, or anything in March. Every page is blank. She takes down
1976. 1975. 1974. Page after page of visible, obstinate silence. She leafs
backward all the way to the very first diary, 1966: not one word. All those years
of her daughter’s life unmarked. Nothing to explain anything.
Across town, James wakes in a blurry haze. It’s almost evening, and
Louisa’s apartment has grown dim. “I have to go,” he says, dizzy with the
him dress. Under her gaze, his fingers grow clumsy: he misbuttons his shirt not
once but twice, and even when he gets it on properly it doesn’t feel right. It
hangs strangely, pinching him under the arms, bulging at his belly. How did you
say good-bye, after something like this?
“Goodnight,” he says finally, lifting his bag, and Louisa says simply,
“Goodnight.” As if they’re leaving the office, as if nothing has happened. Only
in the car, when his stomach begins to rumble, does he realize there’d been no
lunch at Louisa’s apartment, that he had never actually expected there to be.
And while James clicks on his headlights and eases the car into motion,
stunned at how much has happened in one day, his son peers through his
bedroom window in the growing dimness, staring out at Jack’s house, where the
porch light has just turned on, where the police car has long since pulled away.
Up in the attic, Hannah curls up in her bed, sifting through each detail of the day:
the white spot on each of her father’s knuckles as he grasped the steering wheel;
the tiny beads of sweat that clung to the minister’s upper lip, like dew; the soft
thump the coffin made as it touched the bottom of the grave. The small figure of
her brother—spied through the west-facing window of her room—rising slowly
from Jack’s front steps and trudging home, head bowed. And the faint
questioning creak of her mother’s bedroom door opening, answered by the quiet
click of Lydia’s door latching shut. She has been in there for hours. Hannah
wraps her arms around herself and squeezes, imagines comforting her mother,
her mother’s arms comforting her in return.
Marilyn, unaware that her youngest is listening so closely, so longingly, blots
her eyes and replaces the diaries on the shelf and makes herself a promise. She
will figure out what happened to Lydia. She will find out who is responsible. She
will find out what went wrong.
No comments:
Post a Comment